So, I just realized it's been quite a while since my last self blog post. My main focus - besides my current WIP- is yoga.
I'm finding a need and looking for a way to channel my anxiety and anger into something more constructive. Additionally, I'm wanting to lose weight. I've been using NOOM, but sadly haven't gotten past my current plateau. Well, let's play catch-up.
First, I originally got Yogalosophy, a work out coined by Mandy Ingber, a couple years ago while I was still working at the Women's Prison. I thought I was doing great. Getting up at 4:30 am, doing my routine, then working for 12-16 hours. Yikes, was I wrong.
As you can see from my picture, I've been doing a lot more groundwork through this book and this is actually my second time going through it, since I started it again.
During my first go-around, I realized when I'd done this before, I was half a****** it. Cutting corners and just trying to get through it rather than committing and meditating on what was being put before me. Boy have I noticed a difference.
Not going to lie, that first time through I was sore as heck! I kept pushing through because I'm determined to lose this weight. Plus, I've envisioned myself as someone whose attuned to her mind and body and yoga is one way I can get there.
It was not an easy four weeks, and that last week was weak comparatively to the other three. However, I had committed to re-doing this four weeks over and over, while adding to it. Not only does this give me structure, but it allows me to see my growth. Let me tell you, this second time around I can already tell my strength has increased, my breathing has become more fluid and that nagging negative voice that wants me to quit it quieter. There are two reasons why this is good: 1. it is easier to catch when negative thoughts are coming and combat them; 2. I'm feeling happier since that voice is quieter.
Now, I wanted to throw this GIF in here because I find the Kung Fu Panda movies hilarious and the fact that Shifu acts so calm but can be so aggressive or snappy. Reminds me of myself a bit. Inner peace is something I'm striving toward, though it may be a ways off. None-the-less, I find that my commitment to this Yogalosopy and re-doing it as my workout for the long run is a good idea.
My journey toward ridding myself of anger and getting rid of my anxiety has been false starting for way too long. I think I've finally come to that cross-roads and realized that it's more of a fork. I just wasn't looking hard enough. Haha. We all have many paths we can take in life but will power and determination coupled with motivation and desire to make the change are sometimes hard to find all at once. I'm confident this time that I've got all these qualities under wrap now. I'm ready to do this and find that inner peace I've envisioned for myself. Be the woman I saw so many years ago. One who is a published author, good at yoga, and an all-around happy person to be with. I want better for my kids and I'd like to have better tools to share with them so that perhaps their road may not be so long and arduous as mine.
Thanks for sticking with me through my rambling. My avid readers, I'm thankful to have you here along for the ride.
P.S. Readers
I'm working at July NaNoWriMo and I'm almost finished with a full first rough draft of Orchids! So excited. I'm going to start putting out teaser bios for my characters over on my writing blog. Check it out!
Cheers!
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