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Writer's picturetishaustin92

I'll Tell you What!

Before I divulge this first journal entry, I felt it necessary to go over just a few more things. These entries are not dated. Simply because I wrote them before I had any established timeline and secondly, I haven't actually established a time/year system for this world yet. Next, these entries are in no particular order. The only order that these will have is who's entry is out for that week. It'll go: Dante, Dartanian, Damon, Amelia, Naomi. After I've gone through all those then I will (finally) give out the lost journal entries of Dedric Volkenheim. I do hope the readers enjoy these entries and the chance to explore my characters more.

Cheers!


It was a long time before thoughts of comfort and clam came to me. Becoming a Pain Bearer was – at the very core- a way to punish myself and succumb to the guilt festering in me over Dedric. Dedric, my brother, I miss you so much.

Our Father was such a cruel man. None of us truly understood the depths of that cruelty though…even after murdering his own son – though we did not know that at the time.

People FEAR Pain Bearers.

It comes in a package. They fear Pain Bearers, not only because of what we can do, but because of ignorance. Some magic is too much for the mass populace, that goes for the knowledge of it as well. This is, in part, why the rare magics are so rare. The complexities of the magic, not to mention the tolls taken on body and mind, would push more towards death than it would turn out wielders of the magic. As foreboding as it sounds, there is yet another aspect of these rare magics.

If one is familiar with the histories of the world, one may point out persons capable of wielding these magics. This is true, but only to a certain point. Magic is partially inherited and partially bestowed on certain individuals. Those with blood relatives, ones who wield magic, are more likely to become users themselves. However, as magic has a presence of its own, the magic will ultimately choose to allow the castor to use it or not.

Originally, it was thought that magic was a gift to humans sent by the reigning Gods of Magic; however, it has become known that magic has a mind and will of its own. The only point that has yet to be refuted is the neutrality of magic. As such, there is still talk of dark and light magic. But magic – if one bothers to study it – is neutral at its core. Here I go lecturing again. Sorry.

So, the curious question for everyone (though I doubt many will actually read this) is how did I come back from the dark depths of depravity and despair?

Truthfully? I never have.

Comfort. Calm. An understanding of contentment, that is what happened. I can still laugh, still smile, cry, and go into a rage. I can do this, but there will still be a state of emptiness present. My instruction during my training taught me that it is better to be this way. As it helps to do what’s necessary when others simply cannot. It is rarely spoken of, and sometimes seen as horrendous should you acknowledge this truth, but some people will only learn through pain that a Pain Bearer is able to give. Something about needing to be ‘kind’ or ‘non-barbaric’ or some horse shit like that. Tell me, if someone murders someone, cuts them ear to ear, should they not be subjected to feel exactly what they do to that person? Would that not be the best form of punishment? I am not saying they will die, but a Pain Bearer has the ability to doll out the pain felt when such an act happens. If one understands that pain, I am under the impression it would deter someone from doing it again because they now understand what is happening. The mass majority of people cannot stand to be in pain. Even a simple toe stub is blown out of proportion. Anyway, think on that, though I doubt many will.

I am enjoying ranting so here is some more. People see pain as unusual, unnecessary, extreme, or cruel (mainly). What people lack the sight to see are the inner workings of the minds and souls of others. How people present themselves is not necessary who they are. Yet another reason why Pain Bearers come in handy. The deceitfulness of humans – and no one should deny this because if they do, they are lying and only trying to fool themselves, anyway- this deceitfulness can sometimes be shown through the most heinous pain, worse than what one might be imagining now. However, I cannot divulge the tactics of a Pain Bearer lest I give new ideas to bastards.

Well, that and It’d probably make a normal person go mad.

So, here is a layout of my lonely misery. Joy to being a Pain Bearer! Not. I only did it because… I needed it. The end.


· Years of training (including mastery): 100 years

· Years of conditioning: initial 7 years

· Tests: 7


Sidenote: a permanent mark is giving after completion of each test. A mark to show the world what you are, but also to remind one of what they are.

I think I’ll end it here. As I said earlier, I cannot and will not divulge more information. Being a Pain Bearer is a burdensome thing which is why there is usually only one for an extended period of time. Sure, there might be some who think they can take it on, but if the current Pain Bearer is competent and understands the role – as it should be- the soul of their student will show itself early on. If that teacher is, again, competent, then they will cut students lose who will not pan out to be a well-rounded Pain Bearer.

Dante Volkenheim

Master Pain Bearer

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